Children In Film: Diary of a Show Biz Parent

A Day in the Life of Hollywood Living

2011-10-24T09:56:00.000-07:00

It's September of 2011 and much has happened in the last year. Dylan accomplished student of the year and is heading to the 8^th grade; they grow up so very fast. Between the science projects and language arts we considered hiring a scientist to literally split him in half to accomplish his heavy study load.

Ellery ended the year with excellent marks in school and is headed to the 5^th grade. I remember us home schooling her from the first grade thru third grade, then we threw in the towel on home schooling. We learned that home schooling is a talent that not all parents possess; we do not possess that talent!

Dana continues to be SUPER-MOM as she cares so dearly for these two little guys running them from school to coaching to auditions over to friends for studying and so on….

I’m searching for a new hotel company to join, like so many Americans it’s been a trying time for our family, and me, but we have hung in there together. Lets hope we enter the New Year with a plan to lower our country’s high unemployment rate -sure takes the fun out of things.

The kid’s grandmother has managed to spend much of her time here with us in LA. She is the best grandmother ever, reads scripts, and takes them to school, the park, gym and so much more! We are so fortunate to have her with us so much. Our hope is for her to move here from Texas and become a California resident as we have.

Ellery spent much of the summer hanging out with her friends and rounding up as many sleepovers as possible. She started taking aerial classes and loves the bars and ribbons; she is very good! For an action sport she picked up kickboxing, now that’s a work out! Her mother and grandmother join in on the action too!!

Ellery did manage to get in a bit of summer reading when she wasn’t busy having fun and boy did she have a long fun summer! Did I mention she enjoyed her experience at horse riding?

Dylan started a new workout program and has really committed to it; he enjoys working out with his friends at the gym. He shot up this summer and is becoming a young man. He came up with the coolest 13^th summer birthday bash - a GRAFFITI PARTY! The birthday choice was a very cool and colorful style KRISPY KREME DONUT CAKE, so creative and different. He and his friends had a grand time, they did manage to change colors a bit but it all came out eventually. Dylan started guitar lessons again and is working on his favorite licks from Jack White and others!

In August I had the pleasure of spending a couple of weeks with Dylan while he filmed in Chicago. What an amazing time we had as father and son, better than any vacation you could take and the experience for Dylan was amazing and then some! Chicago is such a great city as are the surrounding areas. We enjoyed this very beautiful Midwest City.

As most young actors Ellery and Dylan prepare for their auditions, they have become accustomed to the research and commitment it takes to be ready. We are very proud of their progress and how they have become such young artist yet managed to stay great and grounded kids!

Ellery is recurring on a TV series and as previously mentioned Dylan achieved an awesome role in a Warner Bros feature film that he is working through January, very exciting work for them both. I must say that Ellery has come so close to so many great feature films this year, we know something big is coming up. We must all remember to keep our kids focused on giving a solid audition and the right one opportunity will avail eventually. This is what happened with Dylan and when it the right project hits it’s an amazing experience, as I always say, ALWAYS DO THE WORK and great things will follow.

And of course we get close to great projects only to see them not go our way, we all know how that goes. I am happy to report that our family has a much better understanding of the auditioning process. We have learned to take it in stride and not reflect on the close losses that we experience and realize that if you give a solid audition that is all you can and need to do, the rest is SUBJECT CHOICE that is so out of our hands.

The kid’s agents and management team are such great partners; we are very fortunate in this regard. We have worked to gain the relationship respect our family needed in order to find comfort in knowing our team is in fact a team, a team that can communicate collectively.

In closing Ellery and Dylan had a rewarding summer; their grandmother flew Ellery and Dana to Texas where they spent 2 weeks with family and friends, while Dylan and I explored Chicago, what a great time for us all.

I just learned that I am headed to Chicago again for a 3-week taskforce opportunity with an excellent hotel company I hope to join on with soon. Ellery and Dylan start school Monday, this will be an adjustment, their last weekend is loaded with sleepovers and pool parties!

We are looking forward to a busy and rewarding episodic season and know great things are coming our way.

Have a great balance of the year our Hollywood Family Colleagues and Friends!

~CS

Secretariat

2010-09-27T11:12:00.000-07:00

The race is off to the beautiful city of Pasadena for the screening of the true and inspiring story of the1973 Triple Crown winning horse SECRETARIAT, who to this day, has unbroken winning time records.

Upon our arrival to the theatre we are greeted by CIF Member and Actors Reporter Dharbi Jens who is interviewing this evening’s guests; she was so cute and did an excellent job! Ellery and Dylan stop and talk with fellow thespian Dharbi as the three of them have fun with their pre-screening interview.

As we find our way to see the screenplay of this incredible true story I reach back to my memory and recall the 1973 headlines and media coverage of this amazing Triple Crown feat. Such Great Spirit SECRETARIAT brought to the world of sports and in doing so touched the hearts of so many people horse fans or not!

For a history lesson in sports I recommend this galloping story of what happened to a daughter who respectfully and honorably followed her fathers dreams and after much sacrifice saddles upon monumental victory!

On our ride home Ellery, Dylan, Dana and I reviewed the film and the messages we took from it, here is what Ellery and Dylan had to say:

Ellery felt awesome when SECRETARIAT won his races; she connected with the hard work the mother put forth and her belief in her horse. Ellery was saddened by the death of her father and how much it hurt the daughter. Inspiration is what Ellery took away from the story: "work hard for what you want and believe you can do it."

Dylan took note that sacrifice is not always the worst choice and that on the way of working for what you believe in, it can be tough but rewarding when you stay with it. Dylan, like Ellery, walked away with the inspiration of going for what you want -something all of us understand as we pursue our children’s ambitious Hollywood career paths.

For Dana and I, it was an uplifting family evening of entertainment laced with lessons of life which was again inspiring to us all, lessons we are reminded and challenged with each day.

May the legend of SECRETARIAT live on and always be there for us as a reminder of what it takes to know a winner when you see one and believe and fight for what you believe in. Hey parents, sounds familiar doesn’t it?

Always Going For It!!!!

~CS

Desire + Endurance = Success

2010-09-27T10:19:00.000-07:00

It’s March 24, 2010 and my job has come to an end, the hotel I managed was sold and I was replaced... it happens. So I jump in to help my wife Dana with running the kids to school, auditions and all the things she had primarily been taking care of for the last two years. As school let out and summer began, we decided I would take care of Dylan and Dana would handle Ellery. You know, split up the running around for auditions and all kid-related business matters.

As we continue our journey which has been going on for four years now, we go through levels of growth, and with that our kids become a bit more defined as to what type of actor they are. I'm sure a lot of showbiz families experience this. What I mean is you see what their range is and how they respond to different character roles. I will write another BLOG on that subject later on; this is a BLOG about Dylan’s success and the very hard work that came with it during the summer of 2010.

Dylan, as a rule, ends up in leading roles or as an ensemble lead or supporting lead. With these roles come big sides/scripts and more often than not tricky characters with many layers. The roles require research to really take in the entire landscape of the film and characters. In short, Dylan was fortunate in going out for many theatrical auditions this summer and many of them brought on big and tricky characters, which takes time and serious commitment. The good news is you grow as an actor with this hard work in the same way as if you had practiced baseball all summer or gymnastics and so on. The point is, our kids do get better with this expensive and time-consuming investment and there is measurable benefit in the kids' growth as actors and this is a big part of the actor's journey.

So after coming in second on a few significant roles he finally booked a fun role. Parents, let's pause and really appreciate how hard it is to book a role; if your child is booking theatrical roles, you are very lucky so please CELEBRATE!!! As your kids do, Dylan has worked so hard to get "so close;" it makes you crazy at times. We hear, "he’s not the look" or "he’s too tall,"... "oops, wrong color of hair," "he’s too much of a heartthrob," "the director didn’t connect with him." It's like we're thinking, "when will he get a break????"

Well, after much hard and excellent work, he did; he gets to fly to Vancouver for three weeks where he will work with a fun ensemble cast of kids and dogs. One of the actors is a friend of his; how cool is that?! Dylan is so very excited, and we are so very grateful and of course proud of him for booking this fun role.

Through the process for the film “SPOOKY BUDDIES,” he auditioned for three different characters and, again, finally booked one. Yes, it was a hard and relentless summer of work for Dylan, but it paid off and he will have the time of his life in Vancouver, but it didn’t come without hard work and resilience... lots of resilience!!!

Have a great school year!

~CS

INSPIRED - The Butterfly Room

2010-09-10T12:48:00.000-07:00

OK, all child actor parents or any parent of an actor love to see their kids perform on set RIGHT!!! What an honor it is to actually work on set and eventually see oneself on TV or the big screen. This is a short story of how my little Actor Princess Ellery inspired me on set in July 2010.

Ellery was cast as a lead for a Feature Horror film titled “The Butterfly Room”. This film is being funded by the Italian Government and as you can guess the Director is Italian, super gent to work with and an excellent Director.

The film shot earlier this year for a number of weeks and locations then a few weeks ago Ellery enjoyed 3 days of pickups. And as you might have guessed most of the scenes she shot were the more intense emotional scenes. So most of the “Butterfly Room” family is back on set for a few days, the camera is rolling and we are all moving right along. The first 2 days of the pickups Dana joined Ellery on set, so not to be left out of the fun I offered to take day 3.

Day 3 - Its like the scenes build throughout the day until the final scene, which is a very intense, tricky and emotional one. There were no props or dialog from any other actor for Ellery to draw from, so it was her chops solely that had to make the scene believable. Ellery throughout the day was being her usual spunky self and having a blast working and filming. Back to the scene, Ellery comes over to me and shares with me that she isn’t sure if she can turn the fountain on, you know the TEARS. So I’m saying things like you are so talented and such a great actress, this is a walk in the park for an actress like you. I’m attempting to inspire her thus building her confidence, you must appreciate how tricky this scene really was, and I can’t wait to see the final cut.

So its time to film the scene; Ellery comes over to me and directs me to where she wants me to stand while she’s filming. She is ensuring that I’m in her sight at all times; it’s very interesting to me what makes an actor tick!

I move toward my directed mark when Ellery stops ask me to help her get to that place in her mind where she can subtext her thoughts then connect with the emotion of the scene.

So I kneel down on my knees and start to personalize the visual image I think will work for her and she likes it, we lock it in then starts for her mark. So I’m in position and Ellery is ready to shoot – ACTION!!! Ellery works through this layered scene then turns around for the end of the scene where she is beyond frightened and scared then here comes the crying, screaming for her mommy and the tears that go with it all. Cut! The entire crew is astonished at her amazing performance and I am too. Ellery totally drew me in as I found myself completely lost in the truth of the scene, I mean blown away by her work WOW!!!! The same scene is shot again for an even a closer view and Ellery does it again just as before. Once the director called out cut I watched and comforted Ellery as she came out of her emotionally shaken state. Now the director wraps Ellery compliments her many times over and eventually hands her a beautiful bouquet of flowers followed by a warm applause from everyone, Ellery was so touched and proud.

Once Ellery and I bid our farewells we jumped in our car and headed home. As we talked of the day I shared with Ellery that she cried as easy as I can breath and for her to never ever doubt her ability to become so emotionally real. As we spoke it occurred to me how inspiring it was for me to see my 9 year old daughter reach the depth she did and how very talented she really is. This day renewed my faith and belief as to why we are out here working so hard to create a career path for our children. I was truly INSPIRED by Ellery to continue our journey. You must understand that I had not been that involved over the past 2 years due to my busy work schedule, managing a large and busy hotel keeps you rolling 24x7.

In the end Ellery did excellent work and the film, which will premiere in Italy 2011, will be a great one I’m sure. I will always remember this particular scene and appreciate how much Ellery has grown as an actress since her start in the summer of 2006.

May The Force Be With You!

Preparing for School on Set

2010-08-27T10:01:00.000-07:00

When it comes to working on set during the school year it becomes very important that we accomplish our schoolwork each day and in a quality fashion. From the beginning we've always prepared and organized the kids' schoolwork the night before they filmed. As a home schooling family it has been simple to have our act together - K12 has a nicely laid out plan for each day/week making it much easier to prepare. K12, to us, is the perfect home school program; It's as if it were designed with our industry in mind. Plus, this award winning school learning system is free and excellent! Our new school SFVSFP has changed how we approach going on set. As referenced in another BLOG ,one of the reasons we chose this school was because of their experience with industry working children; as always the trick is communication and planning. There are times when last minute work opportunities or other preparation demands arise, and when this happens we e-mail our teachers and work as a team to accomplish staying on schedule. There have been times when we will place Dylan in an afternoon tutoring math class for insurance that he is on track and he feels confident. Dylan will ask us for tutoring support if he needs it which is a beautiful thing to see: a kid asking for help then experiencing successful one-on-one learning. We are fortunate we have the tutoring available at our school. It is very convenient and helpful. You arrive on set, meet the set teacher and review your objectives for the day and show her/him that you have your schoolwork in order... and there you have it.

I will interject this: I have spoken with many set teachers that shared experiences of kids not coming to set prepared for the schoolwork day. The set teachers have a few responsibilities: physical safety of the child, ensuring breaks and work hour guidelines are respected and that schoolwork is done. If you do not bring your schoolwork, the set teacher will typically have a bag of schoolwork related tricks to work on; however, your child's regular schoolwork may get neglected. I guess it is just important to remember that it isn't the set teacher's responsibility to prepare lessons, simply to act more as a tutor in helping your child complete his or her regular assignments (whether those assignments are coming from a public/private school, online school or directly from you). We have learned that the better we prepare for schoolwork the better the set-teacher processes flows. We have three things in mind when we are on set: do great work for the director/production team, complete schoolwork with quality, and having a fun/safe/respectable time. I have not met a set teacher that didn’t work with us on our school objectives or who failed to appreciate our schoolwork game plan. We are responsible for our kids' grades, so we make sure it gets done and nothing within reason can get in the way of that objective. With Ellery in particular, Dana will often take a portion of the schoolwork and work through it herself; it’s that important to ensure we accomplish clearing any hurdle in our learning path. In a nutshell: get ready for school the night before, meet the set teacher and review as a team what needs to happen for your child’s education that day and stay on track with it. Occasionally we work on tricky shoots and when that happens we work as a team to ensure production accomplishes their objectives too. We realize we too are part of a team so being a team player is essential. It can get tricky when production gets behind schedule - this is a whole different situation and that requires finesse which we will BOLG about at another time. Be it home, public or private school, the success of the day comes down to the parent’s quality planning/preparation and then ensuring the school game plan is followed through. The kids too have a responsibility, but as we know, we must (with most kids) guide them or they will float off... if you know what I mean. Ultimately we want our kids to grow up and take responsibility of their lives.

Do The Right Things...

I believe we are setting the example in everything we do and they will follow. If you believe this, then you can appreciate how instrumental we are to what they learn and what values they take from us when it comes to responsibility an education. Often I say to Ellery & Dylan you gotta MAKE IT HAPPEN!!! Have a great school year kids! ~CS

Alyson Stoner: "The Best Way To Reach My Peers Is To 'Walk-The-Walk' Myself"

2010-08-23T11:26:00.000-07:00

Alyson Stoner: "The Best Way To Reach My Peers Is To 'Walk-The-Walk' Myself"

Back to School

2010-08-13T14:01:00.000-07:00

Here comes that time of year when the reality of school begins and summer fun ends! For Ellery and Dylan, getting back in the school grove is a process just like filming; it’s strategic and comes with a good amount of direction and conversation.

Now, I don’t know about your children, but my kids would rather play and have fun all the time, thus making the beginning of the new school year school a chore for them and us. They do, however, recognize the value of a good education and enjoy school, but I would be less than honest if I failed to say they do fight against school at times. Like most kids they would like to sleep in stay up late and so on; going to school is like going to work for many parents.

Before moving forward I must be respectful and clear that each family must do what’s best for them. We were so set on home schooling and did it for 3 years; then one day Dana realized that she was not doing the kids or herself justice with this schooling choice so we moved on to something different. In retrospect we could have evaluated the school options earlier than we did and maybe we would have changed our game plan. My point would be to take a look at what is taking place with school so that you may ensure that, to the best of your ability, you and your children are pleased with the setup. This review could be based on educational objectives to be accomplished not necessarily changing schools, the idea is to ensure our children are set up for success!

The one great thing we have going for us currently, education wise, is that we made the choice to enroll Ellery & Dylan into San Fernando Valley School for Professionals. This school is designed to focus on the core fundamentals of education: Math, Science, Language Arts and History and offers on-site tutoring when/where needed. Additionally SFVSFP offers excellent educational field trips and more. The school is all about student unity and parental involvement with a tight group and team working for the kid’s education.

One of the things I’ve noticed and appreciate is how the kids seem to all get along with no bullying taking place amongst the group. For the most part, these kids have career objectives (or it could be that their family's work schedules fits with SFVSFP school hours and education system. The thought of Ellery & Dylan being around bullying children has always been a concern of ours; it is so great to see the kindness and respect amongst these kids. We do not worry about them being picked on and all of that mean stuff that can often occur amongst young people!

There is, at times, drama amongst the kids, which is more entertaining than harmful. The drama experiences allow us to help our kids understand matters they were not dealing with when they were home-schooled. A big reason for enrolling them in a social school system was so that they could experience the daily exchange of interacting with students and teachers- an element we were missing before. For this reason their manager was very persuasive when it came to enrolling them into a school. As a team we discussed the objectives and what outcome we wanted, and I must say it turned out excellently.

The kids start school each day at 8:30am and wrap at 1:00pm. This schedule allows us the time for their coaching, auditions and other athletic personal choice activities that fit with their needs and our schedules. Many schools are not designed to work with the industry demands, which is why the school choice is so important when it comes to working with industry children. When the time comes to be on set you must have a school that embraces your objectives and knows how to balance your child’s education while allowing them to fulfill their pursuit of acting.

Shortly we will start preparing for the new school year, we will start warming up with reading and math, a couple of weeks out we will start with a new sleep schedule so we may ease them into the morning wakeup call and so on. There is no easy route to get these two great kids to fall right into the school schedule. Come September 2010 the starting of school will take inspiring conversations which focus/target on our family balance: school, health, friends, family and of course ... acting!

Have a great school year kids!
~CS

Balance - a word about homeschooling

2010-08-12T13:55:00.000-07:00

Balance:

A condition in which different elements are equal or in the correct proportions

Life-School-Acting

After weeks of discussion we finally agreed to home-school Ellery and Dylan and boy what a feat it was to home-school! We had no idea what we were doing and were very nervous once realizing we were taking on the responsibility of our children’s early education. In Houston Ellery had only attended one semester of Montessori School and Dylan was a first grader at the time, thus making us, for the most part, starting from scratch.

After reaching out to a professional school administrator who ultimately created a summer 2006 curriculum for Ellery & Dylan (Dad as the teacher) and who guided us to our K12 home-schooling journey we moved forward. K12 is an award-winning program funded by the state of California, an excellent teaching system it is. We worked with and enjoyed K12 for three challenging years; what an experience for all of us, good and at times, crazy! Then one day in the fall of 2009 Dana had it with home schooling; she was done with it and ready to get the kids into a new school system of some kind. Her final words to me were, "I’m their mother and as such I am not intended to be their teacher too." That was the end of it for Dana, and so again we moved on.

So the school search began. Dana looked into public and private schools then quickly decided on San Fernando Valley School For Professionals. SFVSFP came highly recommended to us for many reasons. We quickly gathered what an excellent school it was- a school designed to work with industry children- plus, its convenient location to Studio City and lastly, the Principle and staff made it a no-brainer decision.

We have figured out for us that the balance of school, work and everyday life for our family members should come with a break from each other. Ellery and Dylan are experiencing a busy life schedule that is topped off by an excellent education at San Fernando Valley School For Professionals. The school provides us with an outstanding team of teachers and principle that work very closely with our young child actors' educations while supporting their career dreams.

The Big Bonus is the many new friends Ellery and Dylan have enjoyed meeting through SFVSP and the friends of friends to even broaden their social life and activities.

The kids are so pleased to start a new year at SFVSFP... yes another year of educational success, fun and social fulfillment!

For more information on SFVSFP you may contact Angie Peiris at 818.985.9485 and please reach out to our family for any support we may offer you and yours.

Have a great school year and may 2010 be the beginning of many great HOLLYWOOD years to come.

Love your children first!
~CS

Slating

2010-05-01T10:07:00.000-07:00

A little while back we got a question on the Children In Film forum about slating. A parent wanted to know if there are different ways to slate depending on what type of audition you are on.

To start, let's define slating. Slating is what occurs, usually, when your child goes in for an audition. It is the first thing the actor does, while looking in to the camera. She states her name and the part she will be auditioning for.

However, as far as I am aware (from my experience with Dylan and Ellery), a slate is a slate. Some (print, commercial, theatrical) may ask for profile turns (meaning your child will need to turn to the side for a profile view; hair may need to be pulled away from the face in a mock pony tail), but some may not ask your child to do this.

While we're on the topic, the slate is the moment and opportunity your child has for his/her audience (the client/director/producer/casting associates/etc) to see him/her for the first time on tape. The casting crew in the room, conducting the slate are equally important. They are the ones that pass you on.

Make your slate count. Be real, with energy and most of all confidence. Own the room!

Taking a class from a well-known casting director can help you perfect your slate and your own personal "slating style."

In the beginning, before you are known by the casting offices, slates and headshots are your on-the-spot calling cards, in my experience. Make it count!

Best of luck from our family to yours,

~CS

"Mojado"

2010-04-12T11:17:00.000-07:00

It was March of this year, and very bad things were taking place within the boarder towns of Mexico. So, I rightfully passed on the opportunity for Dylan to shoot the film "Mojado." The storyline takes place in a boarder town of Mexico and Texas and was scheduled to be shot in the deep southern desert of Mexico.

After declining, our manager called us back and informed us that the director only wanted Dylan for the role and does not want to use anyone else which we appreciated. My fear, however, is kidnapping which is common in certain areas of Mexico and South America. And I was concerned that the public awareness of the film production could allow any potential "bad guys" to know about our arrival. Simply put, it seemed like a potentially nightmarish situation.

As I thought about the situation, I could hear the logic of crazy kidnapping cartel playing out in my head: "cute American actor kid must be rich, so a nice ransom would be no problem." And I could only think of the potential wear and tear that such an occurrence would have on our son's soul. So, I don't consider the option. I say thank you, but no thank you to our manager.

Our team thought I was being over cautions until some of the realities and research on kidnappings started to be discussed. Soon everyone became aware and sensitive to the possibilities. Our manager, now on board with my concerns, calls production to once again pass on the opportunity.

We then learned that the production office here in LA once lived and worked out of Mexico City. An extended and established relationship still exists between the director who is out of London, the LA team, and the production team in Mexico City. I soon became much more comfortable knowing the extended history of our contact here with whom we had met and felt more than comfortable. Additionally, our manager decided to orchestrate a driver and guard for Dylan's protection throughout the entire shoot.

So, we were off to Mexico City. Once we landed, we had another three hour drive to our hotel location and yes, our driver and guard were there to greet us at the gate. Each day we drove 45 minutes to the film location, which was located within the Mexican Desert. The days were hot and the nights cold, but the film will be excellent and that's what matters.

It's good to be cautious and careful when traveling abroad especially in known areas of violence, so make sure you know the details of where you're going and all precautions that will be in place before making a final decision.

May your trips be safe and fun,

~CS

The Casting "Look Factor"

2010-03-15T12:33:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago Dylan, Ellery and I were intentionally standing in the office of a casting director after an audition. Our purpose was to thank this casting director for choosing Dylan as the boy in a film that was shot in March 2010. After introductions, Dylan thanked the CD and they chatted about the shoot and how it went. (More on that shoot later).

The casting director made a point to share something very significant with Dylan. He made it very clear to Dylan that over 120 boys were auditioned for the role and that Dylan earned it not by looks, but by his acting chops.

This film is extreme drama; a lost mother flips her car over and lands 50 feet below after flying off a bridge in a boarder town somewhere in Texas. The mother eventually dies in the presence of her young son. We find a banged-up little boy all-alone in the hot and vast Mexican desert. The boy has recently lost his father too.

Dylan was chosen for his acting chops, not because of his look or matching (which is when a child is picked to match the look of the actors playing his parents). This dramatic film required Dylan to remain mostly in a fearful and emotional state throughout the shoot.

We have learned that many times it's a look that lands the role. One must possess talent, but the look often comes first. But not in this case, which was nice to learn.

I'm sure many of you have felt like your child did a fantastic job on an audition but received no callback or booking. How could that be??? Simple: it's often the "Look/Match Factor"

But when you have a CD articulate this to your child it only confirms how true and real the casting/look factor truly is. As we know, more often than not the kids are matching with adult actors.

We had a seasoned and tenured actress share something with us recently - in her experience the look/match and essence of what casting is looking for is number one and if you have that and can pull of 60% of the actual acting in the auditions you will have a shot at the role.

It's when you get the callback that you want to be able to deliver 100% of the audition. This makes great sense to me. Think about it; if you look or match the lead actors and you can act, you're more than half way there.

By the way, this person's entire family is in the entertainment business and has been for decades. When I talk with people like this who have walked the path we walk, I do listen up.

Have a great family summer CIF Friends!!!

~CS

Leadership Changes

2010-01-04T12:33:00.000-08:00

When it comes to making changes, or considering changes, to your current agency or management situation, the subject is less than simple. In fact, it can be a very touchy and sensitive point of discussion.

I will start off by saying that Ellery and Dylan are represented by the very finest team of agents and managers. They have worked very hard to earn their representation. As for many others in the business, this did not come easily for our family. It required a lot of work to find the outstanding team with whom we are now in partnership.

Without getting into all the details, I will express that things happen at the time they should happen when we as entertainment families logically understand the big picture. The flip side to this is that we must hold ourselves accountable for our part of the deal, thus placing ourselves in a position to make a good and strategic decision once a change is in mind.

Contemplating the Change:

The thought process is this: is a move even necessary or (the reverse) have we waited too long to change? I have friends who moved too quickly and friends who have waited years too long. Because timing is everything, you want to make sure you aren't jumping the gun or waiting until it is too late.

When we enter into constructive conversations on this important matter we realize there is no easy answer to this vital process of timing.

Here is how our family views this topic: (keep in mind that one could actually write a book or a few chapters on this subject matter. I will attempt to make it quick & easy from my point of view.)

The real responsibility for making the decision as to whether or not to change representation lies in the hands of the parents and the young actors; remember this is a business and as much as it is personal you can't take it personally. You cannot wait on your representation to give you some sort of sign that it is time to move on, nor can you fear the confrontation involved in discussing a change with your reps.

How to Assess Your Situation:

First, we have learned to take on the responsibility of viewing each audition as a privilege and opportunity where we prepare accordingly. Once it’s over its over. Our gauge is simply good feedback, callbacks, then bookings. If you are receiving callbacks you are doing great; booking the job is simply the bonus.

Second, we get that agents and managers make their living from bookings. They care for everyone, but we must realize there is only so much time in a day to give. Their job is to facilitate bookings and support growing talent. We must, however, earn our position in their list of priorities; this is done through a quality talent growth process that takes time.

We believe presenting our family as a good business partner and non-troublesome family yields a very good relationship builder. If there is a shortcut, it is simply being busy with bookings, and thus creating a natural presence in the day-to-day lives of our reps. But, as you know, keeping busy with bookings is much easier said than done.

So how do the previous paragraphs fit into deciding whether or not to make a leadership change? When you are determining whether or not to change your representation, you have to make sure you'd be leaving your current representation for the right reasons. Ask yourself if you're considering leaving because you aren't booking enough jobs. This may not be the right reason to leave. Also, are you being a good team member to your agent and/or manager? Are you doing your part? Do you know what your part is? Have you had discussions with your reps on this matter?

If you are at a talent level where you are receiving callbacks and bookings and you don’t feel the agent/manager connection, call your manager and work through your thoughts. Ask for the truth but always be prepared to logically receive it.

We recognize that sometimes people don’t really connect, and as a result a relationship doesn’t materialize which could be a big part of the puzzle.

If you are confident that your family has logically evaluated the various aspects of your situation, take another check and reach out to a non-entertainment friend or colleague who posses a strong business acumen. Doing this can be a good sounding board; sometimes we just don’t see the bigger picture and need help.

We learned this lesson the hard way a long time ago and are often challenged to remember the “Entertainment Rules of Emotion and/or Logic.” As I said before, as much as this business is personal, you can't take it personally. This, of course, is not easy especially when our children are involved.

Risks and Results:

When we discuss family business changes, risks are always involved and change is often a good thing when thought through.

Needless to say, how one handles a change such as this is very important. We are always respectful with change as we are the ones who live with the end result of our decisions and how we’ve conveyed them to others.

For us communication is king; quality work is imperative. Add this to the kids having fun ... and success is around the corner!

~CS

Lucky 3 for Ellery

2010-01-01T12:26:00.000-08:00

Boom!!!! It's early fall and Ellery is gifted with many auditions both theatrical and commercial.

Her mother Dana is running in many directions keeping up with Ellery and Dylan’s sides, scripts, home schooling, gymnastics, acting class and everyday stuff taking place in a kid’s life.

Elle is coming off a five-month break, and out of nowhere she receives three calls within a two-week period where she has booked two excellent episodic roles and a feature film. We are so proud, honored and excited for Elle as she gets back in the game she so loves - filming!

Unfortunately the film shoot conflicts with one of the episodic shoot schedules and Ellery misses the opportunity because the other contracted her first and the dates could not be moved. Hey we get it, this is how it happens; you can’t win them all. Some other lucky kid is now working on the film and having a great time doing it.

Here's my advice: don’t worry about slow periods. Things can light up at any given minute. Enjoy life, have fun, be a good student and always do good theatrical work. It will pay off. This business is like any business; it requires commitment and diligence at each and every opportunity. Like we always say, have fun and go in prepared, that’s all you can do.

A very famous actor and one my personal favorites,Jack Nicholson, once said "everyone gets a chance; the question is will you be ready and prepared?" True statement and more importantly this is the truth in how it all works.

We still keep to our Family Business Formula:

Be Punctual – Be Prepared –Be Polite

Happy New Year!!

~CS

That's a Wrap!

2009-09-17T09:51:00.001-07:00

What an eventful and fun summer Ellery and Dylan experienced here in beautiful Southern California. Trips to the beach, family visiting from Texas, Disneyland, fishing, bowling and more!

Ellery enjoyed an extended break from filming which ended last week when she booked an episode on “The Mentalist.” So it's back to work for my little princess. Ellery is elated to get started as we gear up for Episodic Season; she loves the set, and meeting new friends is her favorite part of filming.

Dylan had an amazing summer shooting three films and a few commercials; he was a busy boy from March through August and now he is taking a short break. He had the pleasure to work with incredible scripts, directors, crew, cast and producers - all fun and rewarding.

As we wrap up summer and steady ourselves for school we will always remember the perfect summer of 2009. So many new friends were made with heart warming memories to reflect on; it just doesn’t get better.

Until we BLOG again keep it fun and stay focused little thespians.

~CS

I Get By with a Little Help From My Friends

2009-07-27T10:15:00.000-07:00

It’s week three, day two of shooting and we get to set. Dylan has his lines down and ready to go. He and his two buddies in this ensemble cast of three orphan boys are ready for another fun and adventurous day at their third location site.

But wait!!! One of the boys worked late the night before and didn’t notice that today he has monologue scenes and more than a few of them! He has not read any of his lines and is frustrated as is the mother who unintentionally upsets the boy causing him to tear up.

Dylan’s Grandmother who happens to be sitting there seeing this say’s to Dylan, "can you please go over and ask to help your friend get his lines down?" Dylan, being the wonderfully giving kid he is, jumps at the opportunity to help his friend out!

Long story short, Dylan and Grandma saved the day for Dylan’s friend; everything worked out nicely. The production for the day was not interrupted and no one knew what happened. The mother of the boy was so grateful for the caring support.

When I heard this last night it made me so proud of how Dylan and Grandma took note of a fellow thespian in a tight spot and did something about it.

Dylan went over all the monologues with his friend throughout the day and worked with him in-between all scenes as they worked through their nine-hour day.

This is what its all about, giving.

We all need a little help from our friends.

~CS

Shuffle - My Time as a Parent in the Casting Room

2009-06-25T14:17:00.000-07:00

I was walking down Sunset Blvd. on a Saturday afternoon in April 2009 discussing the character for the audition that Dylan was heading to, when a rare thing happened...

Upon entering the audition, a nice young man asked me if I cared to sit-in on the audition.

In the three years we've lived here, never have we, the parents, been invited in on a theatrical audition, or any other type of audition for that matter.

As I thought about that, I respectfully returned with a thank you, but no thank you. As I'm sure you can appreciate, I do not like to be a distraction on set or otherwise (you know what I mean parents?).

I hesitated, then looked at Dylan to make sure that he was okay with my decision.

He wasn't. His reply was that he wanted me to join him on the audition, so I'm like, "OK then, let's roll!"

As we headed into the room, I imagined that there would be just a camera person and reader, and that that's the reason they had invited me in. WRONG again, Dads!

As we entered the room there were six or seven people huddled behind the reader and a lonely blue chair, dead center in the room in front of the casting team.

At that moment it occurred to me what strength, confidence and concentration it truly takes to be an actor. I didn't become nervous or fearful for Dylan, but instead, decided to enjoy this rare opportunity. I quickly concealed myself off to the side, behind Dylan's view.

The reader asked Dylan if he was ready, and Dylan politely asked her if he could have a minute. The reader told him to let her know whenever he was ready, and Dylan took 30 seconds or so, then nodded for her to start.

I watched this process full of pride and excitement as he delivered a flawless and beautiful two- scene audition, both intense and emotional. I still get goosebumps when I think back on how well he played this supporting lead character... Wow!

When he finished, the comments from the team were all extremely complimentary. Dylan very politely asked if they wanted him to adjust anything or redo either of the scenes. The response was that he had made excellent character choices and had done a great job! They thanked him, and we made sure to thank them back before taking off.

As we passed through the main exit door my little boy looked up at me and said, "Dad, how did I do?" I stopped, looked at his sweet face and said, "You knocked it way out of the park, son." I couldn't find the words to articulate his exceptional performance, so I used the word "strong" and followed up with, "very strong work Son."

As we walked and talked, I shared with him that I had not yet realized how talented he had become and how very proud he should be of himself. I gave him a hug and held his hand as we celebrated his well deserved moment of glory. I could tell how happy he was that I saw how certain he was of what he was doing.

My final comment to Dylan was that one of three things was going to happen:

1. They book you immediately.

2. They go with someone with the same strong read but with a better character match.

3. They call you back, and then you book it.

He ended up with number 3.

As I watched Dylan that afternoon I thought to myself how I would have immediately cast him without question. I told this to Dylan that day, and have done so a few times since.

Today I'm on set with Dylan, watching him shoot the film. I'm entilting this BLOG, "SHUFFLE".

Three life-shuffling years of relentlessness, commitment and experience, and my son is now a relaxed actor, and an actor who continues to improve and learn his craft. We are so very proud of his beginning accomplishments and growth. Dylan is such a wonderful and giving person, and we admire him so very much.

As of today, he is scheduled to shoot a few more Burger King commercials this year, as well as being on avail for a Disney project, and up for another supporting lead role in a feature film. He is consistently receiving positive feedback, and is enjoying himself, all from just having fun at a craft he continues to love, learn and improve upon.

Hard work and commitment yields the priceless opportunity to be on set, which is where Dylan & Ellery love to be.

An Interview with Dylan Sprayberry

2009-03-10T15:56:00.000-07:00

In light of the fact that the Children In Film Speaker Series will soon be hosting Carl Sprayberry and his two children, Dylan and Ellery, CIF and Carl sat down with the kids for a brief "update interview." We wanted to give readers the opportunity to find out what is going on with the kids.

The following is Dylan's Interview:

Q: How and why did you get started in acting?

DS: When I got started at [age] five, I was too young to really know what acting was. Now I understand and acting is one of my favorite things to do!

Q: What current child actor/actress inspires you?

DS: Not really kid actors so much; I like Hugh Jackman and Bruce Willis because they get so much into their characters.

Q: So do you hope to maybe have a similar career path as one of these adult actors?

DS: Hugh Jackman, maybe, because he plays characters in Superhero and action movies. How cool is it that he booked Wolverine that lead to 3 Xmen Films and the latest "Origin of Wolverine" That would be so much fun to do all of those films!

Q: And he just did the Oscars! That is cool!! So do you see acting as a hobby or a career?

DS: I see acting as a career because it is what I want to do; it's the best! ... and a great way to make friends.

Q:What about school? Do you think it helps with your acting or makes it more difficult?

DS: It helps. In school you learn things about history that can help me when I'm thinking about or getting into a character.

Q: That's a good point; how else do you work on your craft?

DS: When I'm reading a script I vision in my mind who my character is, what he looks like, where I am and what the setting looks like. I also take classes and get coached; this helps me connect with the character.

Q: So you take classes with a professional?

DS: Yes, most Saturdays. And I have for three years now.

Q: Is there something neat you've learned from your parents, in a class, or on the set that you use as a trick or tool while you work? For example, a special way to memorize lines?

DS: Subtexting.

Q: Wow, that sounds complicated. What is that?

DS: I think of one word that best describes the character, like if I were playing a football kid I would think of being a jock and work on building the character from that word.

Q: How do you think your parents help you as an actor?

DS: My parents help me with the script breakdowns and understanding the character. My parents take me to auditions and coaching sessions. They buy me drawing materials and different things that help me as an actor.

Q: Is there something you think they could do better or that you wish they would do?

DS: No; my parents do everything they should be doing.

Q: What would you tell all the kids out there that want to be working regularly as an actor like you?

DS: Be prepared and have fun, you don't have to book to be good, just do your best work.

Q: What would you tell their parents?

DS: I would tell the parents to watch for the other kids telling their kids that they can't act or they're not good, because some kids aren't nice.

Q: Like bullying you mean? One actor tries to tell another one that they aren't good?

DS: Yes

Q: How's life now? Any new news or something you want to share with us? It can be anything.

DS: Life is amazing because my parents make my life great and they steer me the right way with a great home and I have great friends and I love drawing superheros and faces. Ellery and I just completed a film as brother and sister; it was awesome and awesome to work with my sister!

An Interview with Ellery Sprayberry

2009-03-10T14:16:00.000-07:00

The following is an interview conducted with Ellery Sprayberry:

Q: Why and how did you get started in acting?

ES: I got starting in acting because my parents made it happen. Today I really love acting; it's my life, I love acting!

Q: What current child actors or actresses inspire you?

ES: I like Macaulay Culkin. He makes his movies seem so real.

Q: Macaulay is all grown up now. Do you admire any adult actors?

ES: Lesley Ann Warren. She makes me feel inspired and she makes it fun. That's what I really look up to.

Q: Is acting your hobby or your career?

ES: I think it's a career for me because I really, really love acting. I know it will be in my life forever.

Q: What about school? Do you think it helps with your acting or makes it more difficult?

ES: I think it helps. School is what makes you smart. If you want to be an actor or actress you always have to be smart and think because thats part of acting.

Q: How do you work on your craft?

ES: I focus on my scripts and take them seriously. Every time I go to my coach he teaches me and this is how you learn to be better. Little things that help me are learning the beats. I go to a weekly class along with the auditions and filming and that helps me get better.

Q: Do you take classes?

ES: Yes with Janet Alhanti

Q: Is there something neat you've learned from your parents, in a class, or on the set that you use as a trick or tool while you work...like something that makes you memorize lines?

ES: If I am playing a sad character or a scene I think of something really really sad and I don't talk when I'm getting into character. I taught myself how to cry; a scene that is sad will help me get into character and make it easier to cry.

Congrats on teaching yourself to cry! That's tough!
ES: Thanks

Q: How do you think your parents help you as an actor?

ES: Well they always inspire me and tell me things like "you can do it" and "You're the best" and that really helps me get into character.

Q: Is there something you think they could do better or that you wish they would do?

ES: They are the best parents ever. They could buy me an iPhone. (smiles) Just kidding!

Q: What would you tell other kids that want to be actors?

ES: To always do your best on auditions and you'll start making fans. Trust me. After you make fans you get more auditions and even if you book a small part its special to book anything so always think that way.

Q: Would you tell their parents anything?

ES: I would probably say that [they should] always inspire [their] kids and never let them down. I mean, always tell them they are the best.

Q: How is life right now? Anything you want to share with us? It can be about anything.

ES: Well I think life is fantastic, but part of it, on the other side is that my grandfather is in the hospital which makes me feel sad.

We're sorry to hear that, El

ES: My family is worried about my Grandma and it makes me sad when my mom is sad. We try to make the best out of it. I like LA because its so outgoing and fun! I have a new "Movie of the Week" coming out March 7th staring Lesley Ann Warren and Meredith Baxter called "Bound By A Secret"

Congrats Ellery! Keep us posted!!

Dylan's Recognition

2008-10-13T10:33:00.000-07:00

It’s Monday night; Dana and the kids have just jetted from shopping at Fred Segal on Melrose Ave. Then they are on to Santa Monica to make a callback for Ellery, and from there, more fun shopping at Fred Segal Santa Monica.

Fred Segal has this great annual sale and when possible we take advantage of it. While shopping, a lady calls out to Dylan using his character name from an episode they were working on (Mother & Son) a year earlier.

As they connected, hugged and talked the lead actress informed Dana that she had requested Dylan once again to play her son in another episode being shot this month; such an honor for Dylan.

My phone text alerts me as to what’s taking place in Santa Monica; as I read Dana’s quick text it occurrs to me how really cool it felt to see this kind of sincere recognition and memory retention this well-known actress was extending to our son.

As I envisioned the live scene playing out at Fred Segal with our family and this kind actress, many thoughts ran through my head, however, one in particular stood out, good things happen to good people, this was Dylan’s moment of recognition.

Dylan is such a great person to be around. His sense of respectful playfulness, an extraordinary level of sincerity and kindness, and of course it doesn’t hurt to be a talented actor make him a likable child.

Hollywood is a beautiful place; a setting filled with amazingly giving people, one must earn the genuine treatment and it must be real in return, in our family we ask only for the opportunities to earn the gift of being on set.

We define great work as preparation, punctuality and politeness additionally recognizing that we have a responsibility to respect the entire business process.

Repeat business opportunities come from businesses that are reliable and delivery of a great product - a reliable and dependable product and our little actors are the product.

The quicker one understands this reality the better. It can be challenging because this is an often emotionally charged process for us parents; the good news is that it’s easier than we often make it - RELAX have FUN do GREAT WORK!

We are grateful for this exciting entertainment arena we are privileged to play and grow in. We know Hollywood will remember you when a part is right for you and if they trust you, good things will happen.

Our posture is to be kind and real. Fact is, this town has a great memory... Good, Bad or Ugly. Let them remember you and your children as the "good."
CS

A Time to Remember

2008-10-06T12:15:00.000-07:00

We worked for five months towards the opportunity and hope of booking “Eloise Goes To Paris.” The last of Ellery’s six auditions was a noon session with the Director Charles Shyer on Saturday, February 2, 2008.

After the audition we dropped off Stan (Ellery’s Coach) then headed over to our neighborhood hangout Aroma Café. Ellery ran inside to visit as I caught up with a friend just outside the library seating area. Ten minutes later I walked in and took note of Ellery standing at the head of a table engaging with 4 adult ladies - Ellery, submerged in girl talk, was looking quite cute. I quickly noticed one of the ladies was a tenured Hollywood actress.

Respectfully I quickly wrapped up the conversation and thanked the ladies for making time to visit with Elle. When I looked at the leading lady to say thank you, she ask if Ellery was my daughter and I proudly answered yes. She then placed her hand on her heart and said a few very kind and sincere words with respect to Elle.

I never told Ellery who she was; I just left it at a table of nice ladies who appreciated the loving spirit of a sweet little seven-year-old with whom they enjoyed talking and laughing.

Fast forward to April, Ellery auditions for a MOW leading role, and a few days later she is awarded the leading role, WOW!!! Ellery was scheduled to report to set on a Tuesday, and on Monday we get a call inviting us to come and meet the other leads who happen to be filming just a mile or two from us.

As we enter the set, the actress who I mentioned above looks at me, I ‘m reading her lips and I'm thinking she is saying something regarding Ellery. That’s when I figured I must be hallucinating on set, maybe a little too excited. A few minutes later the introductions start and I hear the other leading actress say something to Ellery about someone recommending her for this role,... now I’m really dreaming!

Did I mention that I had a cold and was a bit stuffed up and a little disoriented? :) The next thing I hear from the other leading actress is that she was so happy they took her recommendation and chose Ellery for the leading child role. I have never been so astonished in my life and had no words. I only held back tears of appreciation that I cannot begin to express. I’m staring at this kind actress. I say to her, "how do I respond to something as kind as what you have done for Ellery?" My heart pounding with joy, I gave her a hug and thanked her.

WOW, what a moment that was!!!

She told me that since that day when her and Ellery first met she had not stopped thinking or talking of her, which really got to me; I can’t believe I held it together.

We all know how hard we work to earn the chance to make set. This was a leading role. This gift came by way of an actress who believed in a little girl she had met just two months earlier and after only chatting for 10 or 15 minutes.

If lessons can be learned for other families though, it is a testament to the impressions we all make in the first moments of meeting someone - no matter who they are or what they do. If we make it a point to treat all people with respect and to teach our children to speak up, shake hands, smile and present their true selves, we never know who we will impress or leave an impression on.

Ellery spent five splendid weeks working with this incredible team. From the Director, Producers, Cast & Crew she, was part of a family and an experience she will treasure forever. Her relationship with this wonderful person has blossomed into a real girly friendship; they have breakfast and movie dates they’ve even included Dylan in on the fun.

Once again, Hollywood has such a big heart; there are great and giving people everywhere, embrace the friendships, we can’t have enough real friends in life, its all fun! CS

That One Thing

2008-07-28T10:10:00.000-07:00

Before I share my latest tid-bit on surviving child-actor parenting, I want to reference City Slickers.

Jack Palance, holding his finger in Billy’s Crystal’s face, proceeds to tell Billy’s character "its all about that one thing." This carries on through both City Slickers films and makes total sence in both.

I personally relate to it because life is about figuring things out. It's about finding those very few successful things which lead to happiness, but like anything you have to decide what is important to you. What will you truly sacrifice to earn that thing in life that you want so dearly??

So often we fail to break things down to a simple understanding. What is your "one thing." Are you ready to stick with it?

I choose to believe that most of one's business objectives are simple. If we can remove the peripheral emotional aspects and truly identify what we are trying to accomplish we will know, without question, the exact hurdles we must jet.

So ask yourself -
Are you and your child interested in the craft of acting?
Are you interested in earning money for college?
Do you want fame?

What is your "one thing?" Is it reasonable? Is it respectable? Is it fair to your child?

Going back to the beginning of January 2006, I remember standing in front of the Oakwood Clubhouse in Toluca Lake. As I stood there with Dylan and Ellery each holding my hands and knowing there were many parents and children inside waiting for the evening's serving of a Hollywood professional to teach us all something new, I was blown away with this new and unknown universe. And in the same moment I knew, without question, there is an easy way to accomplish one's goals; it is done by way of breaking down the big picture and discovering the individual parts that yield success.

You must become a student of your opportunity at hand. In our case (and most likely in your case as a parent of a child actor) it was starting a new business, SHOW BUSINESS. And as much as I loved the business (or at least the result), I had no clue as to how to become successful at it.

I was confident, however, in knowing I could find the path to success. I knew we would need to relentlessly pursue our objectives while learning and taking note along the way, again, trying to always simplify our success matrix but never giving up and continuing to break down the success measures.

We are fortunate to have many dear friends today as we explore and enjoy this gift we live in (Hollywood). Being considered "working actors" is a dream world filled with excitement and reward!

As I listen, learn and sometimes advise when we gather to educate and understand our Hollywood path I hear many different things and see warming and sometimes unusual reactions.

I hear so many things that I could write a book, but here’s the point; when you remove the emotion, the guessing of what the casting office thinks (you will never figure this out, Do Not Spend Your Time On This Area) how they liked you, the gossip and spread of false information and so on, you will be able to get back to your "one thing." For our family - the decision has been made to focus on this: Do Good Work.

The only thing you have any control over is the work you are doing. You want acting to be your craft? Do good work. You want to make money for college? Do good work. You want to be famous? Fine - Do good work!.

Once you cross that casting room threshold, go in prepared and confident, listen and have fun, be your self - be real not ON! Do good work.

There you have it, simple, do great work, get great feedback and great booking results. We have learned to be just as excited to book as we are to receive a callback followed by confirming feedback. We have came close on some great projects and have booked great projects; we now know its about the work. If your child felt like they did good work and you had them prepared, that’s all you can do.

Remember, this is a lifelong path, there is no easy way in. Its tough work and like any business you must understand what the real what are defined as true measures of success.

Have fun, be real, be prepared, and most importantly, Love Your Children!

CS

SAG - waiting for the butterfly

2008-07-01T12:11:00.000-07:00

SAG, the Screen Actors Guild, is often a topic of discussion amongst child actors and their parents - - that is, even when they aren't considering a strike! Should my child be in a union? How do I get in to a union? Will I get more jobs and higher paying ones once I'm in a union?

My advice to you when considering your options in regards to unions like SAG and AFTRA is don’t panic, don’t rush, and let the process take course!

So many thinking joining SAG is the answer for an automatic path to success. Although it is very important for a working actor to be a part of the union, it is even more important that you become a member when the time is right.

Obviously you must become eligible first. And while there are a few different ways to become eligible, my fear is that some parents are so eager to get their children into SAG that they go to extremes to make it happen. The problem is, using these "Shortcuts," may get you in to SAG, but what will you do once you're there? The work may actually come less often at first.

The truth is, there are no real shortcuts to joining. I suggest that you devote the same time and energy to finding solid representation and ensuring that when you get an audition you are ready. Once you have booked a few projects (SAG signatory) you will be required to join and things will work their way out. In the process, your child will have become truly ready for SAG.

Think of it like this - if you have a cocoon and are eager to see the butterfly, there are many ways to speed up the opening of a cocoon. You could force it open right? But would the butterfly be ready?

Without a doubt, becoming a member of SAG was a good thing for Dylan and Ellery, but it came on its own. It was not our goal or focus. SAG is very credible and many projects will ask for SAG only casting calls and for this reason, by all means join when your child becomes eligible.

For some, this is easier said than done. The cost is not minuscule. We could have joined much earlier than we did but my thinking was that we were saving $3300.00 to join and also leaving ourselves open forboth SAG and Non-Union auditions which would increase our booking opportunities.

In retrospect, I feel that the SAG-only casting calls way outweighed the non-union opportunities for us and this is most likely because the kids were at the appropriate stage to be joining.

One last point - I believe that becoming SAG says that you have worked and that you have been on a set and you have real filming experience. With young children, this is an important factor and a great resume builder. Being in SAG is an honor and a benefit, but one that is so because it is earned.

Best of luck to all of you - keep me posted on your successes!!

Thoughts on raising a good "stage kid"

2008-06-30T14:13:00.000-07:00

Dana and I watch our little actors closely, additionally we watch other child actors, and actually, we watch and pay attention to kids in general, especially the kids in our immediate lives.

What we are looking at is behavioral traits; We may choose to not allow our kids to associate with kids who are disrespectful. Additionally we speak straight and with great clarity when our kids fail to meet our expectations. If behavior is good - hugs and pats on the back. If behavior needs improvement, we redirect.

Our number one objective is to raise kind, considerate and respectful children. We attempt to bring Dylan & Ellery up as confident and well-rounded leaders. Whether they choose to remain within the entertainment industry is their call, but how they treat others and communicate is our responsibility to teach.

Just the other day we were connecting the dots from our parental behavior to their behavior and in doing so found ourselves evaluating and asking ourselves what kind of parent leaders are we? If our behavior directly affects theirs, then are we behaving as "stage parents" or "child actor parents" (as previously discussed)?

My first thought on what defined the difference between parenting as a "stage parent" rather than a "child actor parent" was based on discrete versus indiscreet parental behavior, on the set and otherwise. I believe that discrete parenting is reflected in children who may lean more toward a workable & genuine style on set. On the other hand, indiscreet & "rougher" parenting seems to find the kids leaning on the side of acting out more.

I am making this concept simple for a reason: While we all know there is much more to parenting than meets the eye, when we see how our children act, we must accept that our children’s behavior is a result of their environment. We obviously realize that everyone has a bad day or moment, that’s a given, but I am referring to consistent behavior traits.

If the parent is over-the-top, overly verbal, over dramatic, etc the child learns to behave in a similar manner. Where as a calm and collected parent tends to yield similar (not always perfect, but similar) behavior in offspring.

We reminded ourselves of how important it is that we remain discrete and focused on the film set objectives, additionally how we can successfully guide our little actors discretely rather than drawing attention to ourselves and issues that need to be addressed within the family, not within the company of the work environment.

The bottom line is that when children are on set and they know their boundaries and are prepared, the production process goes forward smoothly. Time is money and in this business; No one in production wants to work with a challenging individual, child or adult, and we have a choice.

At home and on set we can have a positive impact. And guess what. We, the parents, also have an opportunity to be appreciated as a solid member of the production team, not as an outsider - A simple reward for a job well done.

"Stage Moms" become "Child Actor Parents"

2008-06-29T17:04:00.000-07:00

Stage Mom or Child Actor Parent

The title "Stage Mom" or "Stage Parent" is very defining and on the surface makes sense (ie a mom or parent whose kids work on stage), however, I have reason to believe that in many cases this title is not always a positive one and sometime carries an underlined meaning. This sad, often accurate and sometimes inaccurate label, has its roots planted in the parents of the past who have earned the title - and all the connotations that come with it.

In an attempt to decipher the realities we all face in this industry, I've been studying my surroundings - specifically why we have "earned" this bad-rap name, here we go…..

I believe that we as parents are not always clear on our role and on how to control our children on set, thus the fear factor of working (yes working) with our own children sets in. You see, it is necessary to work with kids, but it is work, when a child is hired. But then they also have to be a real kid (both on screen and off) and are also expected to act like an adult on set. This is where the discrepancy lies. For the parent, this is arguably where things get a bit confusing.

In a recent film shoot we talked with a very seasoned cameraman who shared his candid views on working with children. Lets just say he confirmed the frustrating challenge of getting the kids to listen and focus. No different than any other person whose job comes with responsibilities, he wants to get his work done with the greatest of ease. Now, we must also understand that film making is a creative process, thus making it very different from a traditional job, very unique indeed, yet, its work and people expect cooperation in any work environment.

I do believe we, the Stage Parent, have a hurdle to get over in many set situations. I also believe we must make steps to changing the connotation behind "Stage Parent". One way to start is by changing the title. We are "Child Actor Parents" not "Stage Moms/Dads" or "Stage Parents." In my mind, this is an equalizing title and redefines how I prefer our family to be perceived/respected.

The trick now is to earn the new, positive title by way of teaching ourselves and children how to act on set and most importantly, as a parent, take the time to research general set expectations. Then measure how you are doing.

Because we are sometimes tagged/targeted as "Stage Mom," we must take the responsibility to work out of this title and become recognized as much of an equal to the set as the adults. If we stick to focusing on our Child Actor opportunities and aspire to work to become a seasoned actor, we focus on us, which we can control.

This improving process takes time and, make no mistake, in this small universe we work in, talks and word gets around. We have a choice: to be talked about with respect or lack thereof; we decide the outcome, which obviously impacts one's future working opportunities.

Come to set/work prepared, focus, listen, work safe, be respectful and learn the process.

We must always remember it is work when we're on set - not a holiday. What makes it fun is when we all respect the work process, thus exceeding the expectations of the directors, producers, cast and crew. This, I can assure, will lead to other work opportunities and place ones family as respected equals - part of the team!

~CS

Why am I not Getting Auditions?

2008-05-22T11:42:00.001-07:00

It's a frustrating thing - to want to work, to feel the passion for the craft, to know you have the talent and yet to not be going out on auditions. The good news is it is probably more frustrating for you than your child. Kids are resilient, but if they want to break in to showbiz, we all know they have to go on auditions.

So what if you're not getting auditions? The bottom line is this:

If you don't have representation

Having representation - specifically a good, reputable agent - is key to going on are going to try to submit you to casting directors whenever possible and whenever you fit the role. And when it comes to submitting on your own (casting websites, etc), you're still better off if you can submit a resume that says you are reped.
If you don't have an agent, consider finding a manager who will be able to help you find an agent. In my opinion there are two really great things about having a manager - they help you find representation and they keep excellent contacts to help you get auditions.
Research managers that work with agents who interest you.

If you already have representation

Now if you already have representation - be it a manager or an agent - you probably need to evaluate the relationship you hold with them. How often do you communicate? How well do you communicate? How often are they submitting you? Can you get a record of these submissions. If you're concerned that they aren't getting you auditions (or meetings with agents in the case of a manager) schedule a meeting and sit down to talk about why this may be occurring. Do you need better headshots? Does your child need to take acting classes or gain more experience?
If you are committed your agent/manager will be committed to you. This means when you do get auditions you must make the audition and show commitment 100% of the time. If you don't, your agent may not keep up their end of the commitment level. It's a two way street; make no mistake about it. Agents will only consider you as serious as your commitment shows you to be.

If you're not getting auditions, attempt to address the root of the problem. We've known families who have agents that send the kids out all the time, but we've also known aspiring kids that never seem to have an audition. I really think it is about the representation you have and the relationship you hold with that rep.

Good Luck!

Tips for Networking to Find an Agent

2008-05-21T13:14:00.000-07:00

Networking Tips

Attend parties and events. When the, "What do you do?" question arises (but not before if you can help it) mention that you are (or in addition to your regular work) helping your child pursue acting and it is, in itself, a full time role. Then mention that you're still searching for an agent. This is putting the feelers out.
Enroll your kids in classes - specifically ones taught by professionals who work or have worked in the industry. If there are "parent days" for the class - go.
Get involved in the theater and performing arts programs at school and in the community. It's a great way to give back to the community and perhaps find other parents whose kids are acting as well.
Utilize ChildrenInFilm.com. They put out casting notices a lot, but if you're looking for representation, focus on the managers and agents who are seeking new talent. Post on the forum, and read the KidStart section.
Ask questions. It can't hurt to ask, right?
Follow up, but don't be a pest. We always do our absolute best to remain respectful of peoples' time, opinions and privacy.

Finding an Agent

2008-05-19T12:57:00.000-07:00

For those who journey to Hollywood without an agent or are living here attempting to find an agent, you will find this a challenging and often frustrating path, one that requires great willingness and patience.

We immediately learned to resource industry friends with potential contract and to follow-up on each of them. While one lead may not yield an agent or manager, it could lead you to another path that does get results; this is a process within a process.

Without a doubt, coming here with an agent and manager will get you out of the gate much quicker. Arriving here without representation is tricky, and when you arrive you must remember that finding representation should be your number one goal, before you even worry about auditioning and booking roles.

In our many conversations with parents, we have found that a great headshot, a resume and a professional reel are all key.

There is, however, no easier way in than an industry referral. When you combine that with a great headshot, a proper resume and an awesome reel, you're more likely to seal the deal.

You may be saying, "well if I don't have representation and my focus isn't on roles, but rather finding representation, then how would my child have a great resume and reel?"

It's that old, "What comes first, the experience or the job,' question. I'd say, the job (ie getting an agent) comes after the experience, but in this case you need to open your mind and expand your horizons for what experience actually is. If your child is in a play, it is experience. If your child is taking classes, it's experience. If your child volunteered to dance at an event or won a beauty pageant, it's experience.

For the "foot in the door," networking is key. Go to events, meet parents in the industry, sign up for classes - anything to meet people. Be genuine, smile, and make sure your kids are polite!

We have successfully connected friends with agents and managers and are very respectful to both parties in that we qualify each recommendation with great thought and communicate with accuracy and reason.

There are many excellent managers and agencies; the trick is to find a comfortable fit for your family, and that "fit" will work both ways. This is why the agent/manager interviews are also important. Let your child speak when appropriate specifically when questions are asked that he knows how to answer.

Like so many experiences in life, we grow and learn by trial and error. The path of finding the best match for you can be long, educational and often lonely, but it is doable. We never gave up or lowered our expectations. If you want this, we encourage you to do the same.

Dylan's Two-Hour Transformation to Goat Boy!

2008-04-15T13:39:00.000-07:00

Dylan recently had the exciting opportunity to work with very special makeup artist ( Tyson) on Thursday. Tyson has worked on films like Pirates of the Caribbean and many others. This is the transformation from Dylan to Goat Boy. Dylan loves being in character!

The scene is with another little boy, Timmy McCartney.

Timmy's character is playing in his room when out of nowhere this GOAT-BOY scares the ---- out of him, then proceeds to get in the kid's face! Check out the transformation:

Managing Rejection - It's a Process

2008-04-07T16:39:00.000-07:00

Rejection - Part II

When we first got here, I thought we would advance much faster than we did, but we didn't. That did not, however, mean we weren't moving in the right direction. But we had to learn that fact.

This business, like any business, is a learning experience. What we learned is that "making it in showbiz" is a process. It's a series of steps or stages which we move through together. We must realize that it's not always an overnight success situation. Sure, it can be, but that is not the norm. So for those of you who may feel like things are moving slowly or are needing help managing rejection, I will share with you some of the things we learned during this process of becoming a showbiz family and managing this thing called rejection.

Realizing that you simply lost a role. You weren't personally rejected.

The basic rule is that you need about 2 to 3 years, minimum, to click with the theatrical portion of the business. For us, the most important part of this time period was to learn to balance the "mourning" of the loss of a role we had felt really good about with staying positive for the next set of sides coming our way. It took us a while to learn to manage our losses (rejection). It requires understanding that it just wasn't meant for us. We didn't like it, but that's the way it is. But once you can get in the habit of saying, "That role wasn't for me," the loss isn't so hard.

In July of 2006 Dylan went out for an Owen Wilson film, Drillbit Taylor. We had just signed with our agent and managers, Dylan did great in the audition, casting asked him to meet the producers the following day and so we were thinking, "we got it!"

Wrong, wrong, wrong.

It was an eight-week wait that we hung onto with great expectations! That experience was the beginning of learning to deal with rejection and how to not drag your child into your adult-desperation mindset.

Here's a new way of looking at it: We were not rejected. We just weren't the right choice in the eyes of the decision making team.

It puts a new perspective on things, doesn't it? It does not mean, in any way, that Dylan wasn't good. It was just a choice they made for that role, and looking at it that way makes it a lot easier to walk away from.

Learning the way your child reacts -

Some kids take things differently than others. I have seen all ranges. Some kids cry; some kids could care less. Some try to understand why they didn't get the booking while others walk away from it and switch to a child-at-play state of mind. I believe how a child handles role losses is determined by two things:

How they are raised - which determines how they handle life in general
How the parent handles Hollywood rejection

Ellery recently experienced a five month auditioning process for a film franchise, Eloise. We were in, we were out, she performed 12 challenging scenes, she performed a song, we had six meetings - two with the director, it got down to six girls... and we didn't get it. The Eloise road came to an end in January. We felt that Ellery was so good for this character; realistically we also felt that she may have been too young. This rejection was monumental... if, that is, you choose to look at it like that. We don't and didn't. Neither does Ellery. I will always treasure what Ellery said that day as she, her coach and I drove off. "I know I did great. That's the best I can do. Can we go swimming when I get home Daddy?"

Her coach and I intentionally did not discuss her audition. She had done well and it was now out of our hands. As we say in Texas, "Don't beat a dead horse." We had to believe that things happen for a reason and we took the day to work through and process all of our thoughts on the matter. Then we moved on and we didn't discuss it with Ellery. Leaving her with the "I did great," thought was the best thing to do to help her deal with what could have felt like a big rejection.

Five days later, Dylan and Ellery booked a feature as on-screen sister and brother!

Learning that rejection can make you stronger -

It takes practice to manage rejection and you will get better each day. One thing we do that helps is that Dana and I keep our post-audition thoughts away from the kids. The kids focus on the audition work - that's where the talking happens and the work gets done. We are serious about being successful and we are even more serious about keeping the children genuine, fun-loving and balanced. It seems that when you focus on this balance, rejection gets minimized. In closing, I believe the world is full of rejection. It's around each corner of life, and Hollywood just happens to be the teacher for our kids. Hollywood is teaching them how to be strong which makes good leaders and is a skill they will carry with them no matter what their future holds.

How We Deal With Rejection

2008-03-24T16:27:00.000-07:00

Rejection - Part I

For those in Showbiz, I believe that we must first learn that rejection is not rejection as one would normally think of it. Casting doesn't (thank goodness) walk out and say, "Hey, guess what? We didn't like your work. You stink. See ya later. Better luck next time."

In fact, casting wants you to do well; they are your friends and when the right person comes along and fits the part, it makes their job so much easier.

So if you have images of the Simon Cowell type interrupting in the middle of your child's audition with a disgruntled, "That was the most horrible thing..." (complete with British accent) try not to worry - that is, after all, just for TV... no pun intended.

It really comes down to how you deal with rejection - how you and your children internally deal with not getting the work and, most importantly, how you move on and stay positive and shift your focus to the next opportunity rather than harping on the past. In order to book work, you have to do good work [auditions] and in order to do good work, you have to be in the right (and positive) mindset.

So how do you get this positive mindset and how do you help your kids get it as well? It's tough, but you have to manage the rejection in your head. It's the hardest thing to learn. We call it the "Emotional Roller Coaster." One minute you get offered an audition and you're up - you're riding in the coaster car, heart pounding, up the hill. Clink,clink,clink,clink (get the image?). Then you're at the top of the hill, looking up, looking down. Will you get the part? When you do, you keep climbing like one of those little "fake-you-out" hills that some coasters have. If you don't get the part, you may find your emotions zooming quickly down the hill - your heart in your throat. Then you level out and head up the hill again.

The key is to try to level out those steep hills. We have learned and continue to learn that it is about staying positive even when we're heading down the hill. Maintaining great conviction and belief that we have what it takes to succeed in Hollywood helps us manage the times of rejection. We simply do this through confirmation and feedback from our talent team.

Booking jobs doesn't hurt either. When we don't book, we remind ourselves of when we did. If you're new to this and haven't booked or don't have a talent agent or manager yet, perhaps you can shift the focus from the concept of actually booking jobs to the concept of simply making the attempt. If your child knows that the goal is to do his best and have fun and work hard rather than specifically booking the job or signing the agent, rejection is easier to handle. While you may not always get the job, your child is likely to be able to say he/she did his/her best.

For us, if we did not have confirmation early on we would not have hung tough, as I always say. Without confirmations we would have had to recognize that this wasn't to be and that it was time to pack it up. Decide what is going to help you confirm and at what moment you will shift what those confirmations are (from "doing your best and having fun" to "signing agents and booking jobs").

Rejection is very different for each child and family and success with overcoming it moves in stages. Well, this is our experience. I know Children In Film has a Child/ Family psychologist on their Board of Advisors if you're looking for a more professional view on rejection.

My next blog will go into detail about these "Stages" or the learning process that happens on your path towards showbiz success.

Student Films - Should I or Should I Not?

2008-03-18T13:32:00.000-07:00

At first, we didn't pursue student films, but looking back after two years, I would say that we should have made a stronger effort to be involved with student films. Here's our story:

Why participate in Student films?

It's a real filming experience and a chance to get the child actor in front of the camera, learning how the set works, meeting future industry professionals and most importantly earning potential film credits for sites like IMDB - a treasure we all seek!!

In the beginning our management had advised us to focus only on AFI related films, thus assuring a quality and credited experience. Through our management Dylan did work in a supporting capacity for an AFI film; it was a very well organized and professional shoot. Unfortunately one of his credited scenes was cut, but that happens. In fact, that is an entire lesson in itself - the cutting room floor!

Now that we are a bit more industry savvy, my suggestions to my friends are this:

USC, UCLA and AFI will yield the best chances of a quality experience. Additionally, I suggest they only submit for SAG credited student films.
Do your homework. Make sure the film is credited. Your manager or agent will verify this for you. If you don't yet have representation, start by asking the film's production crew.
On the front of your representation, let them know you are interested in student films. Then work as a team to submit for the best projects.

In February of this year, Dylan was fortunate to book the lead role in a UCLA thesis film and yes, it was SAG credited. Due to the strike, our strategically-thinking manager was on the lookout for student SAG films that would give Dylan and Ellery real set time. A role came up in this 22-page short film. We prepared, made our first-time journey to the legendary UCLA campus - Sound Stage 1.

After the audition, Dylan shared with me his thoughts:

"Well Dad, I ran through the scenes and asked if I could run through the scenes a couple of times until I liked it and they said sure. I did great Dad!"

The next day our manager called to let us know that he had booked the leading role and we were very excited and proud! We were set to start filming on 02/15. In another blog, I write about how we dealt with a scheduling conflict that came up. To read more, click here.

The student film experience -

Dylan shot for five long days, and he was not 100% as we had all picked up a light cold, annoying runny nose and tiredness. Dylan rose each morning excited and ready to get to the set. We would run the lines the night before and on the way to the set. On set he would run lines, block, rehearse and shoot. When you're the lead, it's non-stop, making this a gift of a learning experience.

Our very talented director wrote the script and had been involved with almost 200 films - almost 90 of which she directed herself. She was a very professional and prepared director with a clear vision of what she was looking for, and she even shot with film - classic in her style. That's the thing about a good student film - they tend to bring back the classic qualities of film making thus providing an excellent, artistic experience for the young actor.

Each day the young, professional crew was ready to go, on time and not chatty unless it was work related. Don't get it wrong, they were very nice, just very busy. These students work on each other's films; they are busier than one would realize, and again, a very talented and committed crew.

We enjoyed craft services as nice as we have experienced on any other set.

What did we learn?

My thought is that a student film's big benefit for a child actor is set experience and credits. Dylan and I learned a great amount on the responsibility of what a lead must prepare for and how we can improve next time.

A few days after we wrapped, I emailed our director and asked for three things we did well and three things we could improve upon. We received very helpful critical feedback and will use it to improve our future set preparations.

Out of curiosity, I asked the director what made casting choose Dylan. She said it was his preparation for the character and how well he had performed the last scene, a sad scene.

We also learned that sometimes on set not all cast members gel. All I will say is to keep focused on the work and stay in character; be a professional and work through the challenges and rise to the challenge which is exactly what Dylan did. For children, if such matters arise, I suggest working them out with the director or first AD. Be discreet and never make a scene and only make it an issue if it is truly affecting your work. On the other hand, we became close to one of the cast members and hope to work together again. In our experience it is rare that cast members don't gel but it does happen - be cool, work through it - just like we all do at home with our kids.

The short film Dylan shot is something to be proud of; we are privileged to have worked with this director, cast, crew and locations. We look forward to seeing the final product and seeing the IMDB credit and believe our director will receive praise among her peers and positive festival entry recognition.

In closing, working on a student film is a serious responsibility. The time and expense the student film maker realizes is much and we must be aware that this is their career path and respect that as we respect our own careers.

Double Booking - Dealing with Scheduling Conflicts

2008-03-17T13:50:00.000-07:00

When you're just getting started in this industry, you are eager to jump at every exciting opportunity that comes your way. We are quickly finding that scheduling conflicts, however, arise no matter what stages of the game you're at.

So Dylan booked a UCLA student film. We were so excited as he would be playing the lead role!!

Fast forward a few days - Dylan and Ellery booked a feature film as brother and sister and it started shooting on 02/13. The UCLA film was scheduled to start on the 15th! Ut oh!

Our manager called us, "Guys we have scheduling conflicts and Dylan may not be able to shoot the student film."

"No way. We love the script and there must be a way to shoot both!"

By now we had established a relationship with the student film director and did not want to back out of the film. We, our agent, our manager, the feature film production AD, and the student film director were all working to get both films done. After days of creative scheduling and caring patience from everyone we figure it out. We were beyond pleased that everyone worked in favor of Dylan; ultimately as a team we accomplished everyone's objectives.

At one point I was ready to walk away from the student film. It was getting very complicated and the student film director was making all the sacrifices which didn't sit well with us. We wanted her film to be everything she envisioned and it was becoming unfair to her.

In May our oldest daughter will graduate from college with a major in marketing and photography; we know first hand how important student work is and have the utmost respect for their commitments.

But things worked out in the end and thankfully everyone was able to get what they needed. The bonus for our cooperation was Dylan's ability to work on two different projects.

My advice when scheduling conflicts come up is to do your best to think of everyone's needs. If needs can't be met, then choices obviously have to be made, but if you can think rationally as a team, often things can work out.

Dylan's Honda Commercial

2008-03-17T11:48:00.000-07:00

Here is Dylan's Honda Commercial. We thought you might enjoy having a look!
He's at the beginning - we like playing "where's Dylan" with this one, but Honda is a great name to add to his resume!!

Let us know what you think. Please leave a comment!

The Journey to Hollywood: Leaving Your Home

2008-02-26T16:27:00.000-08:00

Goodbye Houston, hello Hollywood - looking back on leaving Texas.

Saying goodbye to Texas was as difficult as making the journey to Hollywood was exciting.

When we arrived on February 1st, 2006 we initially were thinking that a trial month during pilot season would be a good way to get our feet wet. Within a week we decided to push that "month" all the way to June. Two years later...well, let's just say we never went back to Texas.

Our family embraces the philosophy that you're either in it full-time or you're not in it. Basically, for us, there's no half-way.

As is the case with many families that leave their hometowns in an effort to follow their dreams, the move was risky - a leap of faith if you will - because we did not have representation waiting for us in Hollywood. If you're lucky enough to find representation and then move to Los Angeles, the move may be just a bit easier on you. However, I wouldn't say that it is the only way to go. Sometimes in life there comes a time when the risk to remain in your comfort zone is more painful than the risk it takes to follow your destiny. This, we believed, was our destiny and if you believe it is yours, go for it or you may always wonder "what if?"

It wasn't until late May that we finally connected with management and agent representation.

The time period from February 1st through May was not an overly affirming time for us, however, we had faith and today we are fortunate to be with a dynamic manager and agencies that truly represent us well - they are outstanding!

Initially my wife Dana was in Houston - commuting back and forth when possible and managing her own company. Dealing with this separation was the hardest part for me and the children. Many times I'd say, "Dana, this is bigger than us and we must sacrifice temporarily. We're strong; we can do this."

For 15 months Dana continued to work in Houston while the kids and I continued our journey without a present wife and mother. Fortunately she was able to fly out once a month - without her visits, we would not have made it.

Emotionally we knew what we were managing. More importantly, we were always on the same page and extremely supportive of one another. We faced many moments of truth, yet we always worked through our challenges and, for the most part, managed to make the right steps.

If you're at this stage of the game, my advice to you is as follows:

Come here financially prepared.
Find and surround your family with sincere and grounded friends
If at all possible, come with representation. This does indeed make the path more fun and, of course, easier.
Be resourceful: utilize companies like Children In Film, talk with successful child-actor parents and listen to their stories and recommendations.
Coaches, classes, photographers, etc. are all here in LA.
This, like many things in life, is a process of growth. Don't forget that. You'll live and learn.
Don't be shy in taking risks and most of all, follow your instincts and listen to your children.

For us, the most important thing was to stay close as a family. You will hear many times from film veterans, "Keep your kids real; keep them grounded." It is we, the parents, that make this happen. Because family comes first, we spend our free time together and this keeps us bonded and grounded.

Like many who came to Hollywood before us and many who will come after, we walk a stressful path: money concerns, family separation, traffic, school, a new environment. The list goes on and on. But at the end of the day, we're happy with where we are and where we are going.

~CS

Set Behavior: Your Role, No Matter What the Role

2008-02-21T17:13:00.000-08:00

Working on set is a new experience each time we work; this is because each set and team is new and different, so when it comes to how things are run, there's not necessarily any rhyme or reason. As parents, this can get confusing because there's no 'script to follow' (no pun intended) for how we all should behave.

With respect to focusing on the business at hand, that is, making film, we have a few family guidelines we try to follow and they seem to be working well:

First there are the basics for the kids- the manners and common sense you'd teach at home anyway

Show up on time - remember, no person's time is more valuable than another's
Use manners - look people in the eye, say "please" and "thank you"

Then there are some things that make the kids stand out so that people want to work with them again

Be theatrically prepared and run lines beforehand
Listen - not only to the director during the scene, but also in down time with the studio teacher and other adults.
Ask smart questions - don't just talk to be heard; think about what you want answered

And then, of course, there is safety

Don't run or play unless it's in the scene - sets can be dangerous
Don't wander off
Make sure someone knows where you are at all times - your parent and/or your Studio Teacher

There are also some things we can do as parents:

Document your hours and make notes for your manager
Because the children are young and learning, we've found it helpful to kindly and, when appropriate, ask the leads they are working with to please give the kids direction - so far so good.
We also ask the director to please inform us if we may be of assistants in any way.
We watch the kids, as this is a parent's role on set, however we are not front and center where they can see us at every moment. They know we are there if they need us (and it is important to always make this the case so that they do not have that stress or worry), but not being right in front of them allows them to work independently and develop confidence. Basically put, we aren't "side-line coaches," so we attempt to blend in while being available to the kids and the set team.
We focus on takes and listen for when the children are praised and also for when we have questions we want to ask later (to acting coaches, other professionals, etc) ultimately as a way of learning ourselves

In regards to schooling:

We come prepared with assignments
We establish clarity with the set teacher regarding the school assignments that the children have (they are home schooled)
If necessary, we teach the kids ourselves later to make up for a concept that was missed/unclear on set.

Lastly, we all have fun and respect the work we're so thrilled to have been given!

Ellery's Reel

2008-02-20T09:57:00.000-08:00

We thought you might enjoy having a look at Ellery's Reel. She has done enough work now where we were able to put it together in a video presentation. The reel is helpful, as our agent can use it to submit her for new work. Hope you enjoy it!

Let us know what you think.

Children In Film Wants Your Opinion

2008-02-19T15:42:00.001-08:00

We've been talking about ego and "ego management" here on the Sprayberry Blog. Children In Film wants to know how you manage your child's ego. How do you help to encourage positive self-esteem and how do you help your child deal with rejection?

To submit your answers, click here

Thanks everyone, Children In Film will love your feedback!

Improvisation: It Can Make The Difference

2008-02-13T13:23:00.000-08:00

When we talk with experienced film experts - writers, actors, directors, etc - we often hear about how critical improv is and how it brings out the creative abilities in an actor that can make the difference.

It occurred to me just last week as I watched Dylan and Ellery audition for a feature where they would be playing fraternal twins just how important the ability to improvise really is.

First off, I must give major credit to our very talented and insightful manager for her creative thinking in submitting the kids for this role. Because she is very aware of their abilities and personalities, she made the audition opportunity possible. We are so grateful to her!

So we received the sides (pages of a script containing only the lines and cues of a specific role to be learned by a performer) which appeared to be a fairly easy preparation for Dylan and Ellery. When we got to the audition, we signed in as usual and the kids were taken into the audition room. As a parent, you always seem to study the faces and reactions of the children as they come out of the audition room. Because parents generally are not invited into the auditions, the first reaction is usually the indicator of how things went.

When they came out, they were laughing and jumping up and down. I could feel the energy in the room.

Both of the gentlemen in casting came out smiling and having a fun time with Dylan and Ellery; I'm thinking, "What is going on here? They are having a blast!!"

I became excited and didn't even really know what was so exciting!!!

The gentlemen waved goodbye to us and I was thinking, "Wow, they must have knocked this out of the the ballpark!!"

Dylan and Ellery couldn't wait to tell me how great they did; they immediately showed me their scenes and I was thinking, "If they did this for those guys, a call back is for sure on its way - no doubt about it."

We get to the car and they once again perform the scenes for their mother - she and I were both laughing and enjoying watching the enormous amounts of energy exuding from the kids.

Then it occurred to me: These lines were different!!!

I confirmed this fact with Dylan and Ellery. "Guys," I asked, "these are different lines. You're not saying the same things you said before when you first got out."

"Yeah Dad," they returned as if the explanation was obvious. "We had to improv and it was soooo fun!"

It was at that moment that I knew the improv classes, training and many hours of coaching and teaching had truly paid off. Improvisation, though spontaneous, is still a skill and a technique. It takes work and dedication and training even for the best of improv performers. The kids' training on the subject had come to great use!

Improv is something we continue to work on as part of our resume of acting skills. It will always remind Dylan and Ellery that the ability to react successfully to a curve ball thrown their way is only possible when you are thinking creatively and confidently.

The great thing about improv training is that it teaches spontaneity, creativity and confidence - skills that the children will use in their acting careers, but also in everyday life. A person that can think on their own, outside of the box and on their feet will experience great success in many areas of their life. I highly recommend improv training as 'brain-train' for any child, especially those looking to act.

When asked to improv, Dylan and Ellery didn't hesitate. They ran with it!

Three days later we received a call back and two days after that we received the call alerting us that Dylan and Ellery had booked the job!

The real bonus for us is that Dylan and Ellery will appear in a feature together as brother and sister - what a very special experience for our family!

Improv - it can, and did, make a difference!

~CS

An Interview with Ellery Sprayberry

2008-02-11T10:44:00.000-08:00

* with closing comments by Carl Sprayberry on "Ego Management"

"On how it feels to be on TV"
After a successful interview with Dylan Sprayberry, we decided to interview his sister Ellery - the sometimes girly, sometimes tomboy, sleepover queen and aspiring thespian.

Q: Ellery, how was it watching yourself on TV for the first time? Were you excited?
E: Yea, it was exciting! I was excited because it was the first thing I ever did. It made me happy and proud that I did something.

Q: Did it make you nervous to see yourself on a network TV program?
E: No not at all; I knew I was gonna do great!

Q: So did you let your friends know you were going to be on TV?
E: I told them before [it aired] so they would see the first thing I ever did.

Q: So what did they think?
E: They thought I did really good and that I was cute on TV.

Q: Did anyone call you after it aired?
E: A lot of people called and text messaged to tell me I did great. They said they were so surprised to see me on TV. My grandmother and grandfather were so excited. That made me feel so good.

Q: So how did it feel to know you were on TV?
E: Like, I felt happy that I shot it and that it didn't get canceled or anything.

Q: Do you feel famous?
E: Yes because people have asked me for my autograph.

Q: Are you hard on yourself when you see your work? Do you say "I could have done better" or "That was a good take?"
E: Yes I am because sometimes I do mess up and I could have done better. When I have a good take, it's over and you can go to craft service and hang out with your friends on set.

Q: Does your family celebrate when you are on TV?
E: Yea, of course! We have a lot of friends come over and watch me on TV. We eat, talk and color while we watch the show.

Q: How do you think your brother feels when you are on TV? How do you feel when he is on set or has a TV show coming up?
E: He feels good. [I think he thinks] "you did great Ellery and you should do more film." He does really good and he's really great. He always tries his best and I think that's very nice.

Q: We hear you and your brother just booked a feature film where you'll be playing fraternal twins! How did you react when you got the news and how do you feel about working on set with your real brother as your on-screen brother?
E: I spazzed out; a lot of jumping and screaming and big hugs to my brother! It will be really cool. I'm not sure how it will go because we have never worked together before. I think it's gonna be great!

Comments from Carl Sprayberry

In regards to "Ego Management"

Ego Management - The parental act of regulating a child's self-image; helping to create a balance where positive self-esteem is encouraged and negative conceit and inflated feelings of pride or superiority to others are discouraged.

Click here to read an article on Ego by Children In Film's Child/Family psychologist Argahvan Sadeghi, MFT (coming soon)

Ellery is fortunate to have co-stared on four Network episodes last year. With these opportunities we have been asked how Ellery has responded to seeing herself on National Television and her changes in personality. As a family, we are proud and very grateful for the work we get. Dylan and Ellery enjoy being on set and it is fun for them, so we do make a big deal when their work airs just as we do when our friends' working child actors get work. What we try not to do, however, is talk about it non-stop. While we may reference a scene during a family discussion or hold a small party to celebrate, we don't continuously bring it up. The other thing we like to do is talk about how great the cast and crew were, so that the discussion isn't always all about the kids. Giving credit where credit is due allows the kids to be proud of their own accomplishment while also recognizing the efforts and talents of others.
Managing their egos is more of a question as to how Dana and I manage our own egos - it's 100 percent reflective. Our ego-energy, or the attitudes we convey to others, set an example to our children. We make an effort to balance family, fun, school, health and film [work].
At this point, Ellery does not show any signs of a negative ego for her existing work. This, I believe, is because we don't feed her ego the negative food. Unfortunately it is possible that too many actors are being rewarded simply because they were on TV or come from a famous family. Rewards of this kind lead to feelings of superiority just because the person is in the public eye when others are not. Think about it; it's kind of like Pavlov's dog. If a child begins to think that every time they're on TV they will receive exorbitant gifts, they may become conditioned to believe that the simple act of being in the public eye makes them greater. While "ego managing" we make every effort to avoid this negative conditioning. The kids receive praise for hard work and good work and are rewarded specifically for that with comments like, "Your performance was excellent" or "Your practice and hard work paid off," so that they know specifically what they are being praised for. The attempt is to build a positive self-image, not negative conceit.
As parents we are aware that it is necessary to keep potential arrogance in tact. Our kids are entitled to be confident, proud, and to stand up for what they believe in, but only that. This parental mindset we subscribe to requires a conscious effort on our part. We watch and review their communication styles regularly.
My famous "Dad Line" to the kids is this: My job is to love and protect you. This includes protecting them from their own egos and misconceptions of how the game of life is played.
Lastly, we look out for the "quicksand" that often exists within the arena of child-success be it in sports, Hollywood, or academia. That is, the trap of the limelight which parents are and children are susceptible. If the parents begin to sink into ideas of superiority, entitlement, etc, then it becomes very difficult for the child to emerge from the undertow alone.

Hollywood - Big Universe, Small World

2008-01-31T10:30:00.000-08:00

I'm always reminded of how important it is to remain kind and polite in everyday life. Showing up on set prepared is essential. There's no question about that. But being what I'd call "user friendly" is just as essential. A family that is easy to work with, gets remembered. That counts. A director or crew member that is kind and treats each person as a member of the greater team gets remembered. You might ask, "But does it get the job done?" In my opinion and my experience, yes. Is it because you can catch more flies with honey? Perhaps. From a business standpoint, I believe that a positive attitude and kind words simply go along way in influencing people.

We were fortunate and very excited that in November Ellery booked a co-star role for an episode on network television. One of the first people we met on set was, guess who, the director - a very kind, easy-going gentleman. His first words were, "So how did you like working with my dear friend?" He was referring to another director we'd worked with on a different show. He was kind and inviting.

The short of it all is that the episode shoot went great and the cast and crew were excellent to work with and all ended well.

In connecting the obvious dots here, we see that we work in a very small and highly communicative universe - the Hollywood Universe. It may seem vast at first, but I can't count the number of times "It's a Small World After All" gets sung around the lots, studios and even dinner parties. Fact is, in Hollywood, there may only be three degrees to Kevin Bacon, and if that's the case we should all make sure that our names are coming up in a positive context the next time someone says, "Oh yeah, I know him."

My thoughts: be kind, perform well, stay cool and good things will happen naturally.

~CS

An Interview with Dylan Sprayberry

2008-01-21T14:11:00.000-08:00

* with closing comments from Carl Sprayberry.

"On working, playing and being a kid"

Aspiring Actor Dylan Sprayberry, 9, of Studio City, California shares his candid thoughts and responses to his life as a kid in the biz.

Q: So Dylan, are you excited to be an actor and what are some things you like about it?
D: Yes, very excited. I like going on set and going in the auditioning room and getting callbacks.

Q: For you, what's the hardest part?
D: Well, sometimes it's hard to understand exactly what the director is looking for. They may say words you don't know or understand.

Q: What's the best part?
D: The best part is going to the Studios for shooting, getting up early to go on set and the craft services and going to animated voice-over auditions.

Q: How tough is it to be taught on set?
D: Sometimes a [studio] teacher may give me something new that I don't understand. They may give me fifth grade stuff and I'm only a third grader.

Q: Tell us about your school and how you feel about it.
D: I'm home schooled; I like home schooling because I get to be with my parents all day and for auditions it's easy; I don't have to be picked up in the middle of class. *

Q: Do you and your friends talk about you being an actor? What do they think?
D: They think I will be a great actor. Usually my friends and I watch movies and draw; we don't talk much about my acting.

Q: Do you like going on auditions?
D: I like auditioning, but I like callbacks better because my dad gives me ten dollars and I'm proud of myself. *

Q: Do you get nervous or excited?
D: When I mess up a line on camera I get nervous a little because it looks bad on camera. It is fun because I get to be many different people and I like that a lot.

Q: You sound like you're pretty hard on yourself
D: A little sometimes when I mess up and get mad at myself because I know I can do better than that. *

Q: Has there ever been a time when you didn't want to act anymore?
D: Once because my dad was a little hard on me, but I still want to be an actor because I love meeting new actors and directors and going to new places. *

Q: What made you change your mind and not quit acting?
D: Because I knew I could do acting. I think my dad was pushing me because he believed in me. I didn't want to quit the second thing I love most - acting. Drawing is my first [love].

Q: Do you feel like you want to act forever?
D: Yes because it feels great to go into a room and be on camera; I like seeing myself as a different character, like a giant scarecrow - something scary!

Q: One last question Dylan - and thank you for being straight with us. What are the most important things to you?
D: drawing, acting... and I want to play drums, maybe the saxophone... and play baseball. I would like to travel to Japan; Japan has all the future technology, and they have hover boards that glide a foot about the ground - that's very cool!!!

Comments from Carl Sprayberry:

In regards to home schooling Dylan and Ellery:

We were unsure of what to do in regards to schooling the children and were concerned on how to balance the pursuit of acting and education. The first thing I did was found an expert on child education. Once we completed an assessment process, we empowered this professional to create a summer curriculum for Dylan and Ellery. This gave me the opportunity to see how we as a family would work in this school arena. With much adjusting and commitment we did a good job of home schooling Dylan & Ellery from May through September. During this process I asked our pro this question: if you could send your children to any choice of home school programs which would it be? Without hesitation she recommended K12. My final decision to home school was simply based on the following: We could control their education, who they played with, their rest, their health, the balancing of their school and education and of course the balancing act of taking two children to auditions and working on set. To date Dylan and Ellery are doing very well with the home schooling process, their teacher has given them good feedback at all of our meeting. It is a challenging process, however, we are very pleased at this stage. The bottom line is this: the program works if you make it work. When you have areas of opportunity you reach out for support just as you would do in any school system.

In regards to Dylan's "$10 reward"

The $10.00 reward is just that, a reward. In preparing for a theatrical audition, a child works very hard to remember lines and understand the character. The reward is an incentive-based concept which is how our business society works. It's like a bonus: you work hard, you get rewarded. I believe that to incent is to build good work habit and self encouragement to always aspire to do your very best and approach your work with an attitude of knowing that it is just that. This helps the children prepare and then let it all go when it is over, as opposed to holding on to the result of their work. If you know you did a good job then you can walk away; the entire process works together if you allow it to. By law 15% of all minor's earnings goes into a legally protected Coogan account. In the end, a small reward is a positive reminder that above-average expectations are rewarded; this is a family belief and works for us.

In regards to stressing out and getting "bummed out"

We believe it is a dangerous thing when your children take on this type of stress, so we do our best to prevent it. Again, when you go in prepared and do your best work it doesn't matter once you leave. Now, in our home we've decided together that this is a commitment and we're teaching our children that when you commit to something you prepare and work hard. It's all in the preparation process - we tell them, "you do that well, nothing else really matters to us." As their father, I will express my disappointment with school, acting and so on when we fail to commit to the things we chose to commit to. I can remember a very important session that Ellery was not at the top of her game; she had been on set working and had played a little hard with her friends that week.
Ellery excused herself from the work session and took me to the restroom and expressed that her lines were running together and she was trying to do her best but felt like she was not going to do well. I hugged her and encouraged her to just relax and do her best and not to worry about it. This was the toughest job I have had so far - when your child has integrity on this level you want to fall apart for this precious child, but I couldn't. My job was to remain strong and lift her spirits by way of faith, trust in her ability. encouragement and by reminding her of her belief in herself and my belief in her. She came out and did just fine.

In regards to being hard on Dylan:

I will preface with my personal philosophy: if a child has a talent, we as parents have the responsibility to acknowledge his talent and, within our powers and ability, do our very best to see this talent grow and blossom. This type of philosophy is a learning and growing process more for the parents than the children... well, this is my experience. Just like any thing in raising a child (school, morality, etc) my role is to keep the children on a path and that can be a challenge at times. In these times my reminding him on any level can be interpreted as being hard; I can be quick to react to proper (or improper) preparation, and that is where I get tough. Luckily these tough times are not often at all and we strive to live a path of love, encouragement, support, discipline, and reality.

'Practice' Makes For Perfect Opportunities

2008-01-18T11:08:00.000-08:00

As we hung up the phone with our manager it occurred to us that the audition we just received was to be held at a casting office we had been to before.

Ellery had been up for a part on Gray’s Anatomy, but unfortunately for us casting went with a different ethnicity – they had informed us upfront that it was between the two children. That's just one of those situations that I think every actor faces. As a parent I guess you just have to let your child know that she did her best and the decision had nothing to do with her performance or talents. In entertainment, sometimes it just comes down to the desire for "a different look," and if a child can learn that early on , they can take such situations with stride and even be happy for the chosen fellow actor.

But for Ellery, here was the great news: the audition we were now being called for was for the new ABC spin-off series of Gray’s Anatomy, Private Practice. We knew casting had thought well of Ellery; she was the only girl at the Gray’s Anatomy callback!

So here she was back with the same casting team and auditioning for Private Practice. She gets a callback! Thank you! Then she went on to book the episode! It’s called “In Which Addison Finds The Magic;" we are thrilled! As an extra bonus, one of Ellery’s friends was cast as her big sister; how fun is that?

Ellery shot for six days at Raleigh Studios. She had a fantastic time. The director, writer, producer, cast and ABC were all wonderful to work with.

So what’s the moral here? Well, we realized that Casting remembers your performance and rewards you when the right part for you comes up - for us it came sooner than later. It’s just another “small world, what goes around comes around, you never know who’s watching, and don’t burn bridges” kind of experience.

Our ambition is to always do our best, be prepared, practice the character and know that casting is always watching. Plus something that is easy to forget: they want you to do well and they will not forget a well done audition.

~CS

The Soup Scoop - a Campbell's Commercial

2007-11-27T11:29:00.000-08:00

The Lesson: Be prepared for anything.

We are excited to report that Ellery’s Campbell’s Tomato Soup Commercial is airing at this time. Now for the scoop on the soup:

I mean, wow, a national Campbell’s commercial!

The Auditioning Process: we recently learned that when it comes to auditioning, there’s really no such thing as “the conventional process”

Fade back ~ It’s June, a Friday, and we receive a late-night commercial call for an early-the-next-morning, Santa Monica audition. At this point, we had only been on a total of two Saturday auditions within the last year. We get there and it's rush, hurry, don’t worry with filling out all the call sheet details. Don’t get me wrong; everyone at casting was very nice, just not the usual suspects. I’m standing there when Ellery and a little friend walk out of the audition laughing. They had just stepped past over the threshold ( emerging from the doors into which no parent ever goes) when the casting team asked for the two girls to come back in: “hey, bring those two back in please.” The door shuts. Five minutes later and we are on our way.

At the time it seemed like such a unique audition experience, and I did not expect to hear anything further from it.

Fast forward ~ it’s the next day - Sunday afternoon - and we are buying a cell phone when I get the call from casting. I take the call. “Hi, is this Ellery’s dad? This is casting for Campbell’s and we need to get Ellery’s sizes. She has booked the Tomato Soup commercial”.

I freeze, smile, show the family two thumbs up and thank casting a few times before getting off the phone. We laugh with excitement; I jump and give Ellery a high-five followed by a quick family celebration hug. We are ROCKING ON!!!

The funny thing was, before this audition I had never placed my cell number on a size sheet. I had never received a direct call from casting for a booking,... and never on a Sunday.

This is Campbell’s Soup; I would have expected a call on Monday from our management team. The moral is, anything is possible, so be prepared for anything at any given time. Always show a positive attitude and give your best performance. Oh, and celebration hugs are always Mmm, Mmm Good!

Show Biz vs. Shy Biz

2007-11-27T11:08:00.000-08:00

The Lesson: Good Manners – essential

We love film and music, so it’s a real thrill when we greet and meet with music and film celebrities!

We respectfully focus on being polite and asking Dylan & Ellery to always display good manners without going over the top. Like many parents, it’s something we’ve been stressing since the children were very young, but we’ve come to find how beneficial it is outside of simply raising polite children: it’s a definite career skill.

We don’t approach each celebrity we see; it must be a “just right” situation. Along with politeness, we’d like our children to understand how to be tactful and courteous. Celebrities are often busy and have little time for themselves. We want to be respectful of that.

In our experience, good manners have allowed us the privilege to exchange positive energy with many inspiring and talented people.

We teach the kids to always display good manners because you never know who you are speaking with and who is watching you!!!

Case and point: last Sunday we were picking up balloons for Dana’s (my wife) surprise birthday party when I noticed a very famous comedy actor.

I calmly approached the actor, then immediately complimented him on a very recent success of his. As he expressed his thanks, Ellery & Dylan walked up.

“Hi, I’m Ellery it’s nice to meet you,” her hand extended and a cute smile, eye to eye, then Dylan did the same.

Our acquaintance introduced himself, extended his hand and smiled with sincerity; we spoke briefly, then moved on.

“Who was that Daddy,” Ellery inquired. She didn’t recognize the celebrity; when I told her who it was she giggled.

In our experience, practicing polite manners captures the respect and attention of any adult. We believe teaching and displaying good manners at a young age is a key ingredient for successful adulthood.

Dylan & Ellery embrace the importance of being polite and kind to everyone; our family motto is “sharing and caring.” It’s even stamped on the front of our wedding book.

We continue to work on personal skills and etiquette, which will come in handy with life in general, and while working on set with professionals.

Carl Sprayberry

CIF Note: For more tips on developing manners and improving etiquette visit childreninfilm.com - "Responsible Parenting"